Snow Way!

Good morning, curious minds!

We're back with another flurry of intrigue (and actual flurries if you live along the Gulf Coast!). We've got everything from unexpected Southern snowstorms to an even more unexpected pardon for Silk Road's mastermind. Let's dive into the headlines with something warm (or cool if you're still in denial about winter)!

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The clarity you need for today, right here:

This week's executive order bonanza is going to overshadow everything. Well, move over, Oval Office—because our "winter whopper" forecast just blew it off the front page. Yep, just as we warned, snow is piling up in places that don't have snowplows (looking at you, Florida! ). You might want to bring a parka if you're sipping margaritas on Pensacola Beach.

We humbly remind everyone that we called this big freeze first while half the country talks about Trump's Day One pen-frenzy. Consider your weekend errands iced—literally.

Daylight for Dark Web

Who said it'd be boring? Donald Trump just dropped another bombshell: Ross Ulbricht, aka the "Dread Pirate Roberts" behind Silk Road, is now free. A day after taking office, he called Ulbricht's mother, calling the life sentence "ridiculous" and noting that he, too, had been persecuted by the "lunatics."

Libertarians are overjoyed—this was one of their biggest requests, and apparently, the new president obliged.

Bee-Ware

So, you thought your honey habit was harmless? Think again—French officials just busted a smuggled batch of "all-natural aphrodisiac" honey laced with Viagra and Cialis. Romantic, right? Brands like "Black Horse" and "Jaguar Power" promise you'll become a bedroom legend, but leave out the part about sketchy chemicals.

Is there a lesson here? Stay away from golden nectar that promises to turn you into a stallion overnight. Your toast—and certain other body parts—will thank you later.

Share and Take Off

How about splitting a cross-country flight like you would a pizza? JetBlue just became the first airline to accept Venmo for flight bookings so that you can treat your next getaway like a brunch. JetBlue's move fits into their "we're down, but we're not out" strategy, giving budget-savvy travelers one more way to pay (and maybe no more bickering over aisle seats). Soon, they'll have Venmo on their app—no more complicated PayPal loops, just a friendly ping that says, "Congrats, you're off to Cabo."

Lost in the Future

Ever feel like your FOMO might outlive you? A German startup is betting it doesn't have to. You can buy a subzero ambulance, futuristic antifreeze, and a Swiss bunker for $200K or $75K if you're cool with freezing only your brain.

The idea? One day, after cancer, aging, and (honestly) basic trust issues have been overcome, you'll be able to see flying cars, the end of calories, and whatever else the future holds. Sure, no one has been revived, but maybe rolling the dice on cheat codes to death is just another line item in the "why not" budget.

💡 Core Wisdom

📸 Lens to Life

2024's best nature and wildlife photos from AP photographers.

🧮 Core Count: 900

Number of species of bats.

🗓️ Flashback:

1879 - British garrison of 150 holds off 3,000-4,000 Zulu warriors at Rorke's Drift. The defenders get 11 Victoria Crosses and a bunch of other stuff.

1905 - Workers led by Father Gapon march to the Winter Palace with petitions to the Tsar, and troops fire on them in what becomes known as “Bloody Sunday.”

1908 - Katie Mulcahey is fined $5 for lighting a cigarette, violating the "Sullivan Ordinance" banning women from smoking in public. She tells the judge, “I’ve got as much right to smoke as you have. No man shall dictate to me.”

1973 - In a landmark decision (Roe v. Wade), the US Supreme Court legalized most abortions.

I'm glad we could get together here. Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow!

Fatih Taskiran